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stargate, DanielJackson

Fic; When the bullet-proof glass breaks

Posted on 2015.09.06 at 15:40
Tags: ,
Title: When the bullet-proof glass breaks
Fandom: Daredevil
Word Count: 713
Summary: Foggy's POV at the end of 1x09 and through 1x10. Written for bleodswean's prompt-a-thon for the_lettersea's prompt, "My first thought was, he lied in every word."



Matt lied.

It’s a pervasive thought, constantly springing up between ‘What should I do’ and ‘What if Matt dies’ and ‘Matt is okay, he has to be okay’. Foggy clumsily tries to get him up, he needs to get Matt to the hospital, clearly 911 isn’t an option. And suddenly Matt’s awake, pushing him off, instructing Foggy to call some nurse, and Foggy simultaneously wants to scream at him and hug him with relief.


*


Foggy’s thrilled to meet his new roommate, Matt, even before he figures out who he is. And after he realises Matt is that kid who lost his sight saving a guy, a bona fide hero, he’s even more excited. Matt says he’s happy Foggy isn’t treating him as though he’s fragile glass, like everyone else does. And just like that they’re friends.

They hang around with various groups of people. It’s awkward. Foggy sees what Matt means, they don’t know how to act, and even though they seem to care at first they then seem to forget Matt’s existence all together. Foggy sits amidst these people, thinking about how much everyone communicates via gesture. Some people make an effort to not when Matt’s in the group, but they forget, everyone forgets.

Foggy drops in a comment one time, just to be helpful, maybe partly as a reminder, “She nodded.”

“Oh, sorry Matt.”

Matt tells her it’s fine.

Foggy begins mentioning the gestures more often; when he worries Matt won’t be able to follow the conversation. He starts with just the nods and shrugs, the occasional thumbs up, the ones harder to infer from context. It eventually becomes a habit. Foggy gains an awareness of movement that he never had before, and reaches a point where every comment is automatic. He’s just pleased he can help his friend. He cares about Matt, wants him to be included.


*


Foggy stands there numb, an outsider, as the nurse stitches Matt up. She kept refusing to answer any of his questions, the most prominent being ‘What the Hell is going on?’ He’s silent now. He doesn’t know what to think or feel, pulled between confusion and fear and hurt and anger. Matt has lied about the entirety of who he is. Matt; the one who pulled Foggy into the light. The one who helped Foggy realise what he had always deep down really known; they needed to use the law to help people. That Matt, who believed in the law, and right and justice done by the law, was the person he knew. The person he loved.

But Matt has been running around the city in a mask, using his fists as the law just like those people Foggy thought they were fighting against. And Matt is probably not even blind. Who lies about being blind? Foggy thinks of all those times he mentioned people’s gestures and wonders whether Matt was internally laughing at him. Silly Foggy thinks he’s Matt’s friend. He has no idea who Matt really is.


*


Foggy and Matt spend a lot of time alone together, they enjoy each other’s company, but that’s not all. They’re close.

They tell each other things, small things, big things, details that shouldn’t matter but do. Foggy tells Matt everything. He would trust Matt with anything.


*


Foggy stands in Matt’s apartment. The nurse has left and Matt is unconscious. He doesn’t want to think about the explosions or the cop shootings. Matt can’t be responsible for those. He just can’t be. Even if he knows nothing about the real Matt Murdoch. He can’t be that. Foggy can’t think about it. He doesn’t know how someone is supposed to deal with the person they love most in the world being a terrorist, but he’s going for denial until he finds out for sure.

Then Matt wakes up. And they talk.

Foggy gets all the answers he needs. It’s all so fucked up. But as fucked up as the whole situation is, it makes sense, and he could’ve dealt with all of it. Except the lies, Matt didn’t have enough faith and trust in Foggy or their friendship to tell him the truth. He didn’t care enough about Foggy to reveal something this important. Their friendship was the biggest lie of all.

Comments:


kick_galvanic, zagzagael, skull_theatre
bleodswean at 2015-09-06 19:19 (UTC) (Link)
I really like this. And I think you can even go further with it, make it a series. Although this ABSOLUTELY works as stand-alone! I've often been intrigued by the very question you're posing here through Foggy....when lying constitutes lack of trust, representing an "alone-ness" of a character, and how those closest to that character are expected to interpret this form of untruthfulness.

Great job, J!
swirlsofblue
swirlsofblue at 2015-09-06 19:38 (UTC) (Link)
Thank you, so glad you like it :).

It is an intriguing question. I did enjoy playing with this notion and also consider the line of what constructs an identity and where the true self lies.
kick_galvanic, zagzagael, skull_theatre
bleodswean at 2015-09-06 20:33 (UTC) (Link)
Yes, yes! And that's where I think you could add chapters - how others perceive this "lie" based on their history/proximity. How Matt perceives truth versus lie. Constructing an identity requires fabrication....and the words work together.
swirlsofblue
swirlsofblue at 2015-09-08 20:07 (UTC) (Link)
Ooh, Matt's perception of truth versus lie is such a fascinating concept to explore, especially for a character who is supposedly so grounded in morality and heroism. And yet he says he's blind. Okay, he's technically blind, his eyes are not seeing things. But he can still see the world around him. Does he still perceive himself as blind and thus this is the truth to him?
Murielle
murielle at 2015-09-06 20:34 (UTC) (Link)
Wow! Not one of my fandoms, doesn't have to be. It stands alone, successfully.

Foggy's affection and devotion to his roommate and friend are beautifully expressed, and his sense of betrayal, even after receiving the explanations he needs, is drawn beautifully and simply in the final paragraph. The last sentance hits home like the sound of a gavel.
swirlsofblue
swirlsofblue at 2015-09-08 19:58 (UTC) (Link)
Thank you, so glad you found it accessible even though it isn't one of your fandoms and I'm happy Foggy's emotions came across well :).
Direst Ryl
ryl at 2015-09-07 00:16 (UTC) (Link)
Yikes! Talk about your worst-case scenarios. In Matt's defense, that's not really an easy thing to tell someone when they think you're "just folks." And seeing how Foggy referred to him as a terrorist, not a safe confession either.
swirlsofblue
swirlsofblue at 2015-09-08 20:01 (UTC) (Link)
Thank you :).

Yeah, it's a pretty hard thing to explain. To be fair in the episode when Matt says he was framed for the terrorist bit, Foggy believes him pretty much instantly, so I don't think the terrorist thing was ever really in play for him. It was just yet another thing that needed clarification and that was hard for Foggy.
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